Hey Everyone,
Finally I’m back! It’s been a while since I have made a personal post. I’ve missed you all! I want to shout out to EVERYONE that sent their condolences and prayers for me and my family. You all are the best. It’s like I have a virtual cyberspace family hehe.
This month has by far been the worst month of the year and maybe of my life but I have been pulling through it. It has been like a roller coaster ride….with all its ups and downs. As you already know my sister, Kayla, passed away on April 4th. Then the next week on April 8th we had her funeral. VERY SURREAL. The funeral was absolutely beautiful. My mother did a great job with everything. Over 200 people showed up….yeah I know.
From the time I found out that she died up to the funeral, I was in complete denial and I knew that once I seen her it would finally sink in and it did. I think it actually helped me grieve and move on.
So you are probably wondering what happened to her? Well we are not sure yet because we are waiting on the autopsy report but she was found in the morning around 1030am dead. However, given all of the evidence with her myspace, messages she left for her friends, and given her pass attempts we are thinking it was a suicide. I think I would be more at peace knowing she died due to a car crash…etc BUT a suicide. It’s hard not to blame yourself for what has happened. I think a lot about “What did I miss?!” There are really so many things I wish I could take back and change. However, playing the guilt trip on myself and others will not bring by my sister back. God and my husband has really helped me get through this whole ordeal.
I have been debating on not telling you all about how she died but I decided to because I wanted people to see that this can happened to anyone. Never EVER EVER did I think my sister would commit suicide. Another reason I told how she died is that I hope some one out there can relate to this story or may has a sibling who is potentially in the same situation.
Anyways, I’m going to change the subject because writing all of that stuff digs up very sad thoughts. Let’s see what all has changed since I last blogged: Well I’m officially done with my clinicals WOOHOO 
, I only have two more classes to attend, only two more weeks of school left, Next week I start working full-time….yes some money!! Overall, school is so coming to an end and I’m very ready. Get ready for many graduation pictures you all! I can’t believe it is coming to an end….wow it has been a very long and enlightening journey!
Here is the outlook for next week: Monday: off do some projects, Tuesday: work 7a-7p, Wed: class: presentation, Thursday: off, Friday, Saturday, Sunday: work 7a-7p (fun fun three 12′s in a row….I feel the tiredness already lol)
I hope every one is doing great and I will keep updating everyone how everything goes. I promise I won’t take another long break again lol unless something else crazy happens. Also, I haven’t finished answering all the “ask me a questions” yet but I’m getting there. I love ‘em!
Until next time,
Sarah 
future Registered Nurse RN
Sponsored Links
Posted under Daily Ramblings, Nursing School
This post was written by RN on April 16, 2009
